Embracing the Reality: Therapy Isn't Always Happy, and That's Okay

As a therapist, I have encountered clients coming to a session with the expectation that their issue will be easily resolved and they will be on their merrily way, only to tell me near the end of an emotional session, “gosh, that was tough”. Confronting our inner fears and experiences we had locked away IS tough. Therapy is a transformative journey, a voyage into the depths of our psyche where we navigate a spectrum of emotions. It's a place where we unravel our complexities, confront our fears, and embrace our vulnerabilities. While therapy can be incredibly rewarding and empowering, it's crucial to acknowledge that the path to healing isn't always paved with joy. In fact, therapy often involves traversing through challenging and emotionally turbulent terrains.

Therapy mirrors life—a rollercoaster of emotions. Just as life isn't a perpetual state of happiness, therapy isn't either. It's about exploring the entirety of human experience, and that includes the uncomfortable, painful, and distressing aspects of our lives. So why face these uncomfortable feelings to begin with? It’s been well established in research that avoiding or suppressing our emotions does not benefit us. We cannot selectively choose which emotions we want to experience. When we block uncomfortable emotions, we also impact the positive ones. In fact, research suggests people who avoid emotion tend to experience high levels of pain, increased cardiovascular risk, as well as increased depression, symptoms of anxiety, and interpersonal conflicts.

So if you are experiencing those range of emotions, be proud of yourself for having allowed yourself to experience them. Growth and self-discovery often involve stepping out of our comfort zones. Embracing the notion that it won't always be happy is essential for genuine growth and healing. It's about acknowledging the entire spectrum of human emotions and experiences—the good, the bad, and the ugly. As we navigate the turbulent seas of our emotions in therapy, we ultimately find calm waters, self-acceptance, and the strength to navigate life's inevitable challenges. The journey might not always be happy, but it is undeniably transformative and, most importantly, worthwhile.